Taken from formspring:
Is it ever appropriate to tell someone that you might be talking to that you fucked their best friend. especially, if it was in the past, once & it did not mean anything. or to the grave?
- Anonymous
This is a tricky one and by the way its worded its making it seem as if it really isn’t even a serious relationship. If its not a serious relationship and both parties understand that chances are the best friend may have already forewarned their buddy. Furthermore if its not serious who cares anyway? Have your fun, get your rocks off and move on when the time comes. But for fun lets just assume it is getting serious. If you can tell when there is a spark and feel that it is something that can be bigger than something a just a good time you are left with a serious decision to make.
On one hand you may have to mention it because if you don’t everything is built on a lie while on the other hand why ruin a good thing before it gets good? The thing is if it was once in the past and didn’t mean anything then so be it but it was with a person that is and will be a part of your partners life for ever. That in itself may warrant coming clean.See if it was just a random anonymous fling, a faceless crime of sorts that left you feeling terrified and wondering how you could have betrayed the trust of you unwitting partner I’d be all for clamming up and carrying the pain with you as a reminder of why you should never cheat again. But this ain’t that.
As a general rule if its gonna end up coming up address it up front and be forthright. I can’t tell you what’s wrong or right but I can tell you what I’d do and in this scenario I’d probably end up just being honest.
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